Looking for Mr Right after Age 40

20th July 2015 5:43 pm

looking for mr right after age 40Looking for Mr Right is what every woman who dreams of happiness, love, and marriage seeks from childhood to adulthood.  The journey is a profoundly changing one that can end swiftly or take some time to play out.

Not every journey has a happy ending however.  For some women it takes longer to find Mr Right and may even take a few Mr Wrongs before she gets it right. Sometimes it can be after you reach the age of 40 plus.

The truth of the matter is that no matter how old you are, you will have opportunities for finding a good man.  You need to recognize them when they are presented to you and take the steps necessary to attain your dream.

They could be in the apartment building that you reside in or across the street at the local gym.  Maybe he is shopping for supper at the neighborhood grocery store. I bet there is even a little coffee shop or restaurant within a block of home where guys go to eat because they don’t have time to cook.

The question is do they have the qualities you are looking for in a man.  Even better, could you identify these qualities when meeting them?  After all, you’ve been looking for Mr Right for a while and you’ve run out of ideas, right?

Focus on finding Mr Second best…

Older women have a tendency to keep looking for the man of their dreams taught to them by romance novels, happily ever after movies, their mothers and grandmothers. Change up your expectations and look at men who have less of the qualities you’ve been looking for.

By downsizing your list of qualities in a guy you will open avenues that you would never have dreamed of. You will find a good man who will provide you with all the love and happiness you desire.  After all, a relationship is supposed to be a work in progress not a done deal right out of the gate.

Make sure you are Mrs Right…

If you don’t believe in yourself or have doubts about who you are and struggle with looking at yourself in the mirror every day, then most men will not give you a second look.

Deal with your personal issues before looking for Mr Right or you will be disappointed. If you are greedy, self centered, unforgiving and/or like to have everything your way, you will need to work on these bad traits in order to find the right guy for you.

Teach yourself to be caring, kind, interesting and unselfish so others and not just Mr Right will want to be around you.  Everyone has bad days, but if those days outnumber the good days then you need to step back and look at yourself first.

What are your expectations…

Take a long hard look at what it is you are expecting from the right guy.  Are you wanting more than is possible for him to give you?  If you define what it is you want from a man both personally and physically then you will better understand if your expectations are high and need to be adjusted.

Unless you are attracted to younger men, finding a good man with rock hard abs and a muscular build may be more difficult when you are older.  This is because there are other women over 40 (and under 40) looking for the same type of man.  By knowing your expectations and fine tuning or lowering them if need be you stand a better chance of finding the right guy to make you happy.

When you open yourself up to other attributes such as humour, integrity or intellect you discover that they can be quite appealing and sexy. Also physical attributes can be improved but something that comes from within cannot be easily changed.  Get to know someone before passing judgement and you’ll discover emotions and feelings you forgot you had.

Are you looking in the right places…

If you are a somewhat reserved and shy woman, you may be only looking in your own close circle of friends.  There it is comfortable and ordinary. It’s time to get out of your normal routine and start doing some things that will make you uneasy and anxious.

This will take some courage and a little voyeurism on your part, but by stepping outside of your comfort zone, you will open other doors not previously available to you. Don’t jump in with both feet right away but start slow by testing your boundaries until you find something that you feel semi comfortable with.

For example, if you normally hang out with your friends at gatherings or events where you meet guys once in a while then try going somewhere different like the bingo hall, church social, neighbourhood pub or just go online and create a profile.

Don’t plan on looking for Mr Right but plan on getting out there so guys will see you.  Be consistent and do it a few times. Pay attention to the guys who you see there frequently and those who only show up every now and then.

It won’t take you long to feel comfortable and catch the eye of a great guy who notices that you aren’t an easy target looking for a night of fun but someone who may be Mrs Right.  Remember not all guys just want someone to take home and sleep with.  There are a lot of guys who are struggling with the same lack of confidence or discomfort as you are.

Show some patience…

Most of all be patient as dating is a numbers game and in order to find a good man you’ll need to date a few of them to find one who makes you feel the way you like to feel. By taking your time and getting to know the guy first before jumping into bed with him or telling yourself he isn’t the one, you’ll learn more about the right kind of man you are actually looking for.

To sum it up…

Looking for Mr Right will be easier for you if you know who you are and love yourself for being you.  Keep your expectations a little lower than you would have for your earlier years and look for good qualities that will last for the long term and not those that will or can be changed in short order.

Remember to change up your routine when looking for a great man and don’t be afraid to try something new.  Sometimes the excitement of a new venture will make you attractive to men without you even realizing it because you are having so much fun.

Don’t let yourself think of failure but keep dating guys until you get what you are looking for.  Sooner or later you will find yourself attracted to a man or find a good man attracted to you and as they say…the rest is history.

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